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The Fire Within

May 30, 2019

I have this small electric fireplace in my bedroom. It is nestled close to my bed and provides both a warm (yet artificial) glow and soothing warmth. I was often found lying on the carpeted floor directly in-front the vents during stressful times in my life. The soft drone of the fan would drown out external noises and the heat would create a symbolic hug that, many times, lulled me to sleep. It occurred to me one day that I had picked the most hidden away spot in my own house to cower away from my struggles. I had made myself as small as I could in a womb-like scenario, reverting back to an infant state. One could argue that the tiny carpeted area in front of the fire was my “re-set” space and deemed necessary in order for me to find peace - this is partially true. But this “re-set” saw me shrinking rather than growing - hiding rather than being seen. I didn’t leave that space feeling rejuvenated. Although the fireplace provided comfort, I was in need of a coping strategy that would engage my soul, propel me forward, and provide growth.

The past few years have resulted in a massive transformation of my public and private self. Finding a place where I belong, was something that I thought would come easily as I slid into my position and purpose. I didn’t account for the fact that I have to fight for a future that was intended for me. I was in a battle to utilize my full potential while paying tribute to all the facets of myself. 

 

Enter trail running.

 

The trail community is many things. They are inclusive, but they will also call you on your crap. They are welcoming, but they are also direct. They are comforting, but they will also take you on edge of the scariest trail you could imagine. They push you…to be you. They encouraged me to be the person I would dream of while curled up on the carpeted floor in a small nook of my bedroom. 

 

They are my fireplace.

 

- Happy Trails

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